“I don’t want to be one of those guys, at nine o’clock at night, worrying about the WENUS…”

I am sitting in bed.  I have a liter of Evian next to me (I know, I am so fancy).  Roger is plugged in.  He didn’t get charged last night, so he has been down pretty far today.  Apparently having internet on your phone sucks the battery down to nothing.  Or maybe I am just paranoid.  Probably.

This weekend Jonathan will be in California.  He heard back from UC Davis.  He has been accepted.  I was all for celebration.  Bring on the french fries and ketchup!  Dance around in circles.  HUG, DAMNIT!  But he seems very calm about it.  He wants the letter.  Not the online “acceptance,” but the feel the of paper beneath your finger tips.  There, the smell of ink, the acceptance letter that says “Congratulations!”.  He has had his moments of rejection.  Something he never had to deal with before graduate school applications.  Jonathan has always been the gifted one.  Making straight A’s (and most of them A+’s), having a ridiculously high GPA, lots of academic honors.  One of the things he had to learn with graduate school was that it was not all about academia, but about creating lasting relationships with professors.  We have an interest.  Let’s build new knowledge.

California is a go.  It’s a reality.  Davis, California.  So scary and so absolutely, fucking awesome.

I am having my fifth surgery (and I am 23) next Wednesday.  Damn.  I will have another one about a month from next Wednesday.  Seems like small potatoes.  I am almost resigned to this shit.  It’s a part of my freaking life.  A part I really hate, and wish did not exist.

John is leaving Shipping.  His last day is next Friday.  It’s going to be so strange without him in the room.  He is such a larger than life character.  And he will be gone.  And D will be even more worried and anxious.  Doug has pneumonia.   So he is out.  Again.  Doug seems to attract illness.  It probably doesn’t help that he smokes and eats only the fattiest of fatty foods.  But then again, look at me.  Vegetarian who sticks to primarily non-fat foods, does not smoke, drinks rarely (although it has not always been that way), and tries to exercise regularly.  And I am on my FIFTH FUCKING SURGERY (beginning at age 21, until present).  Isn’t that un-fucking-believable?  It turns my stomach.

Back to this weekend.  Sleep will be at an all time low.  Starting tomorrow night.  Must remember to buy sleeping pills before getting home tomorrow.  I have become one of THOSE girls.  The ones who can’t sleep unless their other half is home.  Reminds me of what my mom says (“Your father’s snoring is annoying, but if I don’t hear it, I am so scared.”)  Well, when I don’t hear Jonathan “sneaking” around the apartment in attempts to be quiet while I go to sleep ridiculously (grandma-like) early, then I toss and I turn.  Add into this situation the anxiety I have been feeling anyways, and we got not just ONE sleepless night, but several.  Oh glorious SLEEPING PILL, how I loathe and love THEE.

P.S. I want Pesto.  Z’Mariks.  I might have to get some this weekend.  I wish I didn’t work until 9:00 PM, or I would be zooming there after work Friday and getting me some goodness.  But nope.  It closes at 9:00.


  1. Spartacus: Blood and Sand.  Simply cheesy and fucking gory, and kind of like watching soft core porn.  BUT IT’S HILARIOUS!  And sucks you in.  And you see lots of tits (for you men) and lots of muscular men (for you women).
  2. Harper’s Island.  It was on television last Winter/Spring.  I recently got it on Instant Play from Netflix (via Xbox).  WAS/AM addicted.
  3. (And we have a new category…)  PLAY DRAGON AGE for XBOX.  It is AMAZING.  (Sorry for the generic description of amazing, but my brain is officially on vacation.  It stops working past 10:30 PM.  And some times sooner!)

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